Archive for the ‘Think This-ish’ Category


Welcome to the age of the Faux Media Apology. Here are some tips and reminders in the event that you need to refresh your understanding of the Anatomy of an Apology. Take note fallen “heroes,” “icons,” and “idols.” As you seek redemption via a carefully-worded, sound-bite-worthy corporate script, master-minded with  focus-group-like precision, and thus guaranteed to win back the favour of your constituents…We, your former trusty supporters and allies, duped, disappointed, yet desperately hopeful, await your strategically-timed remorse-missive delivered through the lens of PR-savvy handlers… But wait. Perhaps you prefer the lucrative, prime-time, blue chip, advertising-sponsored-put your dollars next to…. [ Read More ]

My husband and I practice mindful parenting and gentle discipline. This means no spanking, and no hitting. At all. Ever. This also means that there is a lot of talking in our home. We do not subscribe to any hard and fast parenting “rules”, rather we work together to establish flexible “guidelines” so that our two children aged 4 and 7, will learn to feel secure and confident, heard, loved, and respected. In our home, we talk about our feelings, and we encourage self-expression. We talk about what it means to show respect and to be respected. We talk about…. [ Read More ]

Dear Jodie Foster: I Think You Should... stop sucking and blowing

In August, which is like 1000 years ago in media time, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattison broke up because of… QUELLE HORREUR!… an infidelity on the part of Kristen Stewart. I won’t chide you if you don’t know “who” they are because if you don’t know who they are then you win! You win because you’ve successfully managed to steer clear of The Hype and live your life, and not the life the media are encouraging you to live. However, if on the off-chance that you haven’t been sucked into the media vortex of “other people’s lives” permit me to…. [ Read More ]


You know when I got up this morning I didn’t exactly get up to write. I got up to jump rope, but I thought about writing. I’ve thought about writing every single day of this week [of the last few months to be precise], and I’ve done nothing about it. I feel like I have too much to say, and I have too many words to put down. There’s too much meaning attached to the words I want to use, and I don’t really feel like explaining what I mean. [Of course I could stand to be corrected, we all.... [ Read More ]


TIME magazine has taken the “Look Ma, there’s another Ma who’s better than you!” media trope to a whole new level by disingenuously asking “Are You Mom Enough?” So if you’re “just” a mom and you’ve been thoroughly confused by the not-so-subtle subliminal media suggestion that you’re uncomfortable with your parenting choices or what to call yourself other than “mommy” — because apparently calling yourself a mom means that you have unwittingly undervalued and enslaved your womanhood — you’re not alone. Please click through to to read the full article.      


1. If you’re stuck, and you just can’t anymore; let it go. You can always pick up where you left off, or leave it altogether if that suits you better. 2. If you’ve tried, and you’ve failed; let it go. Success lays in trying. 3. If you find that you just can’t measure up, don’t. You aren’t supposed to. Validate your personal strengths rather than focussing on your weaknesses. 4. If someone’s mothering offends you, look away. That mother is doing what is best for her child. 5. If your mothering expectations are at odds with the child you’re parenting,…. [ Read More ]

[The following is a response to a comment I made on to a commenter who asked me to further explain my position on the post that asked xoJane readers what they thought about the ESPN headline that referenced the ethnic origin ofJeremy Lin. I wrote it here because as it turns out, I have a lot to say on the subject]. thanks for your comment marie. i’m not sure what you’re asking, or how to answer you exactly but i’ll take a stab. please bare with me, because there is SO much better and more articulate literature out there…. [ Read More ]


Contrary to popular media culture belief, as the mother of two girl children aged 4 and 6, I do not spend every waking moment of our lives ruminating on the subject of pink politics as it concerns my girls, but the media and certain organizations hell-bent on breaking the so-called mould of stereotypical girlhood would have you believe I do. To date, I have not suddenly become paralyzed with indecision when it comes to choosing pink Lego over non-pink Lego for fear of raising marginalized and/or gender-conforming human beings, nor have I lost sleep over the fact that Mulan now…. [ Read More ]


It would seem that I have a lot to say. Some days it just so happens that I have more to say than other days, and some days it just so happens that I have more to say than most people. I can’t help it. Or more accurately I don’t want to help it. Since becoming a Mother I seem to have misplaced my internal mute button. It’s not that it no longer exists, it’s just that I’ve chosen to disregard it. Mind you, in disregarding it, I have felt stronger and more empowered than I’ve ever felt in my…. [ Read More ]


Please consult the “Forrest Gump” Glossary of terms and explanations if you are not familiar with the title of this piece. It is a well-known American cultural reference.   Once upon a time I worked in an international creative design studio that practiced graphic, product and interior design. My employer*, a man whom many considered “smart” and “successful,” assumed that [most] people were stupid. He never actually said “people are stupid,” but he implied, and applied this theory to his creative practice. In many ways he lived in that rarefied world of privilege. His world was filled with luxury and…. [ Read More ]

The Media = the-greatest-show-on-earth?

A “Media Circus” describes a frenzied journalistic approach to the media coverage of what is typically considered “A Big Event.” News agencies dispatch reporters from far and wide to cover a significant “breaking” news item. It’s described as a “circus” for it’s over the top appeal and for the sheer number of individuals and news outlets covering it.  The televised OJ Simpson Escalade Escape Circus stands out as a spectacular event in its time. Most recently, the coverage of Will and Kate’s Wedding Circus in which entertainment outlets made round the clock non-news by interviewing other media outlets about the…. [ Read More ]


Recently a friend posted this on Facebook. 22 comments later, the comments got kind of heated. It’s always interesting to me what ordinary people [like me] think Rich People [like Oprah] should do with their money. I find that the people who are the most vocal about how Rich People can SAVE MANKIND are fairly typical in their suggestions as to what they presume are the most pressing needs in our world. [Suggestions include: save a country, prevent and cure world hunger and thirst; prevent homicide, matricide, and suicide; cure debt, cure illiteracy, cure and decrease infant mortality, end child.... [ Read More ]


Mother’s Day, Sunday, May 8, 2011 was a particularly awesome Mother’s Day to remember. Why? Because it was the first Mother’s Day in 6 years that I actually felt like I earned the title of Mother; and it was the first time in 6 years that I actually felt like I deserved the title of “Mother.” [My daughers are 6 and 3 years old]. Oh, and Oprah returned a tweet of mine. But more on that later. Up until this particular Mother’s Day, I mostly felt like I was going through the motions of Motherhood. You know, mentally checking off…. [ Read More ]


Previously I posted about the self-congratulatory beast known as “Celebrity Charity’ism.” I and others have come to the natural conclusion that more than dealing in self-less altruism, increasingly these so-called celebrities are engaging in acts of charity for the sole purpose of boosting their public image, and let’s face it, their already inflated egos. And yes, for each celebrity who is able to lead with her heart and not by the ego which is in/securely attached to her public self-worth, increasingly there are more who do it for audience recognition and because they’ve learned that it’s perceived as the right…. [ Read More ]


Tyler Perry’s films don’t bother me much. And I don’t take it personally when he brings to the big screen larger than life caricatures of what he [and others] perceive to be the ‘essence’ of black American folks and black American culture. I’m not bothered by the fact that what he may or may not do in terms of character development is “representative” or not, because I personally have never had a Madea in my home, nor have I ever come across a Madea in all the years that I’ve been on the planet. I don’t have physically larger than…. [ Read More ]


I didn’t physically grow up with my father. But in many ways I did so emotionally. And the older I get I realize that he and I have a spiritual connection which for me seems to have replaced the physical proximity I never knew. Growing up in a single parent household, my sisters and I never wanted for anything. At least, I never felt like we wanted for anything. [My younger sister might have a different re/memory as younger siblings are wont to do]. When my mother decided to leave my father that fateful day in Nigeria, her decision “sealed…. [ Read More ]

Categories: Think This-ish

Today at 12:35 EST @dreamhampton313 posted the tweet: “Meditating on the difference between cultural criticism and artist. Considering abandoning the first.” dream hampton is none other than Hip Hop’s well-respected chronicler of Urban Life, among other things. She was  a dear friend of the late Christopher Wallace [AKA Biggie Smalls] and she knew and grew up with many of Hip Hop’s original MCs.  She is also the silent co-author of Jay-Z’s, autobiography,  Decoded. dream’s tweet struck a chord with me because as one who endeavours to eek out precious time to occasionally write about cultural “truth,” I often find myself…. [ Read More ]

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